I've got a whole city to hold down

May 19, 2004

The Bi-Annual Rock’s Back Article

Posted by Lazlo Hollyfeld

Since it’s only been a couple of years since the White Stripes & Strokes broke big, I guess it’s time for a new round of these.

I thought I would be pleased there was an article in Newsweek that mentioned Death Cab For Cutie, Flaming Lips, Broken Social Scene, Modest Mouse, The Shins, Wilco and Iron & Wine. And then I read the fucking thing. Here’s my quick laundry list of things that bugged me most…

*That it took 4 people (one listed at the top, and then 3 others listed in italics at the bottom) to write this crap.

*The entire subheadline (“In the 10 years since Kurt Cobain died, a once thrilling genre has struggled. Now a new community of bands is emerging and finally making it safe to go back into the mosh pit.”). That is so amazingly bad I’ll just let it speak for itself.

*The mention that some of the band names “sound like parodies”, as if the author were someone’s out-of-touch great-aunt who only listens to Lawrence Welk. Those wacky kids, and their wacky band names.

*Awful brief descriptions of bands. Modest Mouse is “bizarro-rock”. Iron & Wine is “Southern-smoked folkie”.

*The claim that Jeff Tweedy, James Mercer and Ben Gibbard are “revitalizing the four-minute pop song”.

*Billy Corgan as wise old sage, giving his grand opinion of why “this generation” hasn’t broken big like Nirvana or Pearl Jam.

*The opening paragraph shows no awareness that Coachella was mobbed this year mainly because of Radiohead & The Pixies, not the bands it goes on to mention.

Anyway, go ahead and read for yourself…and wretch.